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i don't know how to act

i got horrible news dec29th

my father died

should i be upset yes

am i not really

maybe its shock

or maybe i am just dead inside

i barely knew him

it was his choice

no one will tell me where the funeral is

or anything

so i can at least send something if unable to go

what to do

when ur caught in a web unable to get out

when that side hates u for no reason

other than u were born

what to do when u need to see him

even when he is dead

just to be sure what they say is true

what to do when all ur options are gone

what to do when ur forced to believe

what the family that hates u says.

i have awakend

slowly it has happened

im getting more power each day

learning new things i can do

sometimes its fun

sometimes its scary

when u can reach out and touch someone

who isn't real or in a dream

you go where your heart sends u

you never know what will happen

i feel the urge to feed it gets stronger

as thedays go by

i hide all that i am

from everyone in fear

that no one will accept or understand me

so i go through this alone

i do not know any other way to do it

i don't understand any of it but i will fight

as i walk alone i will awaken

time is not here

not on my side

goes too fast

and then too slow

the day feels never ending

the night goes by too quick

if only i could make the night last longer

the days quicker

time feels like it stops and freezes

what to do when ur bored

what to when u crave blood during the day

but you don't go out for fear of being discovered

how do u help what can't be changed

when things are as they are

and all u want is more time to do everything u dream

someone tells u they love u

only to stab u in theback

y do people try so hard to be someones friend

when in the end all they get is pain

i tell the truth and and i am the liar

bombarded by hateful words

and ill i think about is revenge

howill get even wit everyone who has hurtme

one way or another it will happen

i am not to be betrayed

so if its to be ill remain single and alone

like i was meant to be

dn't got time for ppl to say shit to me or bout me

so im done trying to be friends and done trying to be in a relationship

i will never betrayed again.....

one day

ill come to you in the night

you will be scared

but only for a lil while

then you will feel alive

like you have never felt before

you will see the world how i see it

as a playground full of dinner

as you wake ill teach

as u grow hungry ill feed u

as you crave sex ill give it too u

cause im the thing thats in the darkness

one you need to watch out for

sneaks up too get u when ur not lookin

my little girl

you came so early

my water broke oct28th

my labor started oct31st

you were born nov1st

you were so small i didn't know what to think

i was scared u wouldn't make it

but you were a fighter

you wanted to be here

i wanted you here

that was a month ago

now your bigger stronger

they say you will come home soon

i can't wait

but at the same time i am scared

you got sick needed a blood transfusion

now your doing well

but i am still worried

we will get ready to take you home

you will get sick again and we will have another delay

i love you so

but i don't know if i could handel anymore prob

so ill be positive

i love lookin in your eyez babygirl

your a fighter

your my angel

your my peace in this world

your my serenity in this crazy life

thats why ur named serenity

u mean the world to me

and i am glad your finally here and all mine